Today is Blake and I’s 6 year anniversary! It’s been a crazy, difficult, and sweet ride the past 6 years. Our first year wasn’t exactly a honey moon year. If you’ve read The Story Of Us, you’ll know why lol. Either way, it was the foundation we’ve built our relationship on. It was tough but we made it through. Stronger for what we faced as a couple.
The next couple years were tough as well but I knew we would pull through. I knew we loved each other enough to always make it work, and we have. Through tough times as parents, as gf/bf, coparenting with Brysen’s mom. We have made it through each obstacle life has thrown our way!
We argue all the time. Laugh together. Wrestle until he ends up hurting me (every single time). Make fun each other daily lol. We are best friends. Soul mates. Etc etc.
The BIGGEST thing that has helped us in keeping our relationship happy is communication.
C O M M U N I C A T I O N is KEY
I’ve always been open about what I’m feeling. If I’m mad, sad, or whatever and I feel he needs to know, I LET HIM KNOW! Lol. I never keep anything bottled up. If I do it just grows and grows and grows until I explode and it’s not pretty when I do. I like avoiding that and so does he. I think by me always confronting an issue and talking to him about anything/everything he does the same with me. We aren’t afraid to get in each other faces and speak our minds. We are really open and honest about everything!
I know this may seem simple and obvious but I know people that don’t care to communicate. They think “he/she doesn’t listen anyway so why bother?” Or they believe he/she should know how you’re feeling already and if they don’t then screw it. No one is a mind reader lol. You have to tell your person what’s wrong or what you’re feeling. Make them LISTEN! Lol I promise if you start talking with each other your relationship will be a lot stronger!
So communication kind of goes into the next reason I have for you. This is one of my favorite quotes and it applies to so many situations. Something to remember, especially in a relationship.
There were plenty of occasions where we could’ve threw in the towel and ended our relationship. I didn’t need to deal with some of the crap I did and neither did he. We both could’ve started over with someone new if we wanted to. That would’ve solved nothing though lol. So when there were things thrown our way that made our relationship difficult we WORKED IT OUT!! We talked about the problem, we came up with things that would work for us and we fixed it. Throwing away our relationship wasn’t an option. We loved each other and wanted to make it last.
That is the main thing here. WE WANTED TO MAKE IT LAST. Relationships are work. You work to get it and then work to keep it. It’s not easy but if YOU want it, you will make it work so that your relationship stays alive. Blake and I want to make US a forever thing. So we put in the work to keep our relationship strong and loving.
Blake does things I don’t really care for. I do things he doesn’t understand lol. I use to nag at him all the time because I didn’t like what he did. He didn’t understand why I always “dressed up.” It caused some arguments. It was a constant struggle lol. He is who he is. I am who I am. I might not always like his hobbies or how he does things but I’ve learned to accept him for who he is. He’s learned to accept my fashion obsession and other quirks I have lol. It’s not easy being with someone who doesn’t see life as you do or share the same interests in everything. Most likely you’ll never be with someone who does.
Acceptance has played a huge role in our relationship. You can’t be mad at someone for not being who they are. You have to learn to accept them as they are. Learn to love them for everything they are as a person. If you love him/her and want to make it last, then you have to accept their flaws, quirks, hobbies, etc.
I’ve looked at other girls and their boyfriends get them roses just because. I’ve read countless books where the boyfriend does such romantic things for their girlfriend. Or these boyfriends who always post something about their gf on social media. It would make me wish Blake did those things for me. I would think he’s not doing it right.. It did make me sad lol. Looking back I wish I could slap myself.
Every relationship is different. Every person shows love differently. Just because Blake doesn’t buy me flowers all the time or comes up with a grand romantic gesture for me does not mean he doesn’t love me. And it certainly doesn’t mean he’s doing it WRONG. Expectations have caused some bumps in our relationship for sure lol. I’ve learned from it though. He shows me love in his own way. It’s not generic. When I want something he will hand me the money to go get it. He cuddles with me. He will give me a foot rub (the way to my heart lol). I stopped expecting him to do all these things I’ve read in books and seen from others. It’s been the best thing for me and for us. When you stop expecting and just love for what is your relationship goes smoother and more appreciated.
Relationships aren’t easy. These past 6 years have been filled with joy, tears, obstacles, laughter, arguments, and a whole lot of love. We’ve been through hell and back. Our love has lasted all these years because of the work we’ve put into it and simply because we want to be with each other.
I hope my story can help anyone who is struggling in their relationship. Sometimes we just need to see we aren’t the only ones who are going through something. What has helped keep your relationship strong and alive?